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Wish Upon A Diaper.

2010 October 28
by distracted daddy

Playtex Diaper Genie Diaper Pail

If there’s one thing that all babies do it’s fill diapers. That’s pretty much the first baby milestone. Diaper-filling. Our daughter excels at this. She fills diaper upon diaper.

All those diapers have to go somewhere before they go into a landfill and never biodegrade. You could put them in your regular garbage can. Sure, if you don’t mind the wafting stink that will soon follow.

If your house wasn’t featured on the show Hoarders, you’ll probably want to manage the diaper odor. How? Maybe with a genie that specifically deals in diaper wish granting. Yes, a Diaper Genie.

Diaper Genies are specially manufactured garbage cans that are lined with plastic bags. The plastic bags and closing lid help to seal in baby odors. As far as I know, they do not grant wishes. I’ve yet to see a blue Robin Williams emerge from the Diaper Genie.

If the Diaper Genie was an actual genie and granted the usual three wishes, my first wish would be that the refills weren’t so expensive. You see the Diaper Genie comes from the Gillette school of product design. Quick marketing lesson: Give away the hardware for next to nothing and charge for the refills. The refills are where the money is. Gillette does it with razors. Wireless companies do it with cellphones. And the Diaper Genie does it with bag refills.

So my first wish, cheaper refills.

You’re thinking that’s a bad wish. I should wish for infinite wishes, right? Except genies give 3 wishes. Not infinite wishes. They probably have a union rule banning wishing for wishes. It’s a loophole they closed after the first genie gave infinite wishes and ruined the wish quota costing all the other genies their year-end bonus.  Or something like that.

The Diaper Genies doesn’t grant wishes. It grants you large, heavy bags full of diapers. The bags sort of look like anacondas if anacondas ate soiled Huggies instead of capybaras and if anacondas were made of see-through plastic.

Playtex Diaper Genie Advanced Diaper Disposal

"It stinks in here. I'm leaving."

The bags get quite heavy if you don’t empty them often. When you carry these extra-heavy bags you move quickly. The fear of the bag tearing before you reach your destination weighs heavily. You worry of its contents emptying in your driveway like you’re the guy stuck with the store-brand in a Glad garbage bag commercial. Luckily the diapers have always remained contained.

The smell? Most days it’s contained. Some days, well some days the genie is out of the bottle.

10 Responses leave one →
  1. DC Urban Dad permalink
    October 28, 2010

    Is that 1 or 2?

  2. October 29, 2010

    I think it’s the Diaper Genie Elite II. Though I’m not sure. I do know that it’s filled with 1s and 2s.

  3. jimmy permalink
    November 22, 2010

    great one

  4. Sherry permalink
    May 22, 2011

    So true about the Diaper Genie refills! My husband and I have figured out a way to cut down on the amount of refills we need to buy. We open the diaper genie and place a plastic grocery bag in the bottom. Then we snip the bottom of the bag above the knot and empty the diapers into the grocery bag and dispose of it. Then just tie a new knot in the bottom of the refill bag and you’re good to go! This allows us to only lose about 6 inches of the refill bag instead of 3 feet! :o )

  5. September 20, 2012

    I received my beautiful giraffe bag inside of some time the course notes said they could give it. I’m incredibly make sure you together with the company along with the rapidness in which it had been delivered. I strongly suggest it!!

  6. May 9, 2013

    This is absolutely brilliant! Congratulations on trying to revitalize the written word no texting, no email, no whatever’s next! I don’t own a computer proud of being “computer free”. Maybe old fashioned, but receiving a hand written letter is likely to be so refreshing! Thanks for focusing on a rapidly declining art the hand written letter and/or note.
    Can’t wait to receive my first letter! Judy Robertson

  7. May 30, 2013

    more at Voice of America (blog). Filed Under:

  8. June 2, 2013

    Hi there this is kinda of off topic but I was wondering if blogs use WYSIWYG editors or if you have to manually code with HTML. I’m starting a blog soon but have no coding know-how so I wanted to get advice from someone with experience. Any help would be enormously appreciated!

  9. June 2, 2013

    Hello. magnificent job. I did not expect this. This is a splendid story. Thanks!

  10. June 3, 2013

    Very interesting details you have remarked, appreciate it for posting . “Great is the art of beginning, but greater is the art of ending.” by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.

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